Wednesday, March 25, 2009


Just a quick note. I have been foolish enough to go and contract a norovirus, which is currently doing the rounds of south west Eng-Er-Land. For those of you not in the know, noroviruses are an unpleasant winter diarrhoea and vomitting sickness with aspects of gastroenteritis and lethargy.

I currently resemble the bloke in this picture:

Only without the caring nun-types tending to my needs. I know I'm ill as my appetite has gone and even the thought of a nice pint makes me shudder, which is practically a pre-terminal event for me.

Still, things are looking up now, as I'm finally losing the grey pallor and regaining my normal blue hue, which is good.

So, apologies for the brevity of this post (alhtough some might find that a blessing) and for the lack of recent updates, but I'm POORLY!


In the meantime, I am going to ask you to imagine a menagerie.
Now, imagine being the manager of that menagerie.
Can you imagine managing an imaginary menagerie?


  1. This sounds like the coolest illness ever except maybe for "consumption". If you told me you had a norovirus when we bumped into each other on the street Iwould pretty much assume you were a reanimated corpse because I don't bother with your fancy "knowing things"

  2. Sweet god of mercy! You cannae even bring yourself to down a pint?

    Make good your final few days on the turf dear friend.

    Surely hell is about to freeze over?

  3. Jules,

    Sorry to hear you been ill. Get well soon my friend.


  4. Kurt - I know it's not consumption cos I'm not wearing lace and writing romantic poetry.

    Jimmy - I will. I will. I'll just have a last pint to see myself off . . . ooh, I'm getting better!

    U - Thank you my friend. It's nice to get some sympathy, even though I'm probably milking it a bit.

  5. I'll leave a pint behind the bar for when you recover.

    Your English, so a cold pint of shandy it is, my fiend.

    ... i've already eaten your pork scratchings.

  6. Jimmy - Me scrathings! You really earned your surname tonight!

    And don't forget my tiny umbrella and glace cherry.

  7. That virus has violated you, but at least your tongue can still twist and shout.

  8. Hey, I'm naturally blue too! For real!! My skin!!

    I hope you feel better soon. Try not to get all skinny-armed and ribby, that look only works on martyrs.

  9. Mr Bananas - It's the only part of my body that still works. Other than my whingeing gland.

    Steamy - I'm probably a few months fasting away from showing my ribs, but thanks for your good wishes anyway!

  10. Is a norovirus like a rotovirus? Same amount of letters, so probably the same thing.

    Also, I am just about managing to imagine my managing of the imaginary menagerie. I imagine.

  11. Jules - big sympathies. But just think of all the quality time you get to spend at home, being ill on your own time. True dedication.

    I'll consume a wee port and lemon to your health

  12. i do hope y'all are feeling better now, sugar! bless your heart! xoxo

    (thanks for your kind words earlier.)

  13. Vic - Yeah, definitely the same thing. Ask any passing diseasyologist. When my mum asked if it was norovirus, I said "No, it definitely izzavirus". Then I gave myself a little pat on the back and an imaginary high five. And everyone thought I was great.

    Mdme DeF - You're never alone with a virus!

    Savannah - Ta very much. And you're welcome in return!

  14. Noroviri are a lonely brood
    Who just want to make a friend.
    They sneak up on a piece of food
    And get you in the end.


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